Blogger Meet-Ups
Dear BlogHer10 Attendees,
It is once again that time when a horde of estrogen charged women and wistfully wishing for more estrogen men descend on a city to feel womanly and rawr with their bad drunken selves. I think this kind of bonding is great. We men do it on a semi-more regular basis with a lot less fanfare and at a cheaper price at this place we call “The Bar”, but to each their own.
This year you will be invading New York City, which happens to be where I live. Now while I highly recommend you follow Avitable’s Guide To BlogHer so that perhaps you’ll actually get more out of the experience than some cheap swag, and I highly recommend the PoppyCede’s Guide To Subways so that perhaps you’ll get to actually take home that cheap swag, I have a few things that I want to offer myself…
NYCWD’s Common Sense Guide To BlogHer For The Common Sense Challenged
- Watch where you are walking. I know this might seem simplistic, but the problem is most people become entranced by the height of our concrete and steel buildings… and inadvertently step in front of a bus a la The Final Destination. If this happens, 911 will undoubtedly be called for you but we make no guarantees to your survivability
- Tip appropriately. The recommended NYC tipping rate is 18-25% of your bill… including the tax. If you can’t do simple math then try using the advanced feature on all your smartphones called The Calculator. Failure to submit the appropriate tip my result in verbal and physical harm. If this happens, 911 will undoubtedly be called for you but we make no guarantees for your freedom
- Know your place. Now I know in your minds this event is a huge deal, and in your minds you’re taking the city by storm! So if there are 2,500 BlogHer attendees, that’s a whopping 0.0001% of the daytime NYC population. Your number will rise a little bit in the evening, but not that much. Keep this in mind when you are asking for directions (use actual NYC names instead of the fabricated Bloggy names) and undoubtedly taking photos (because even though public view is legally allowable, people may not want to be either inconvenienced by your 30 minute pose while the camera phone focuses or captured by your constant clicking). Failure to be cognizant of this may result in a pedestrian collision or your camera being smashed by a raging commuter. If this happens, 911 will undoubtedly be called for you but we make no guarantees for amnesty of the required photo permits.
- DO NOT THREATEN THE CROC GUY WITH NEGATIVE BLOG POSTS IN EXCHANGE FOR SWAG! That is called extortion. We already have an organization that does that. You may have heard them. They’re called the Mafia. Failure to adhere to this may result in Tommy Two Tones and Chuckles visiting you on an elevator. If this happens, well, 911 won’t be called for you but we can guarantee that you will become fast friends with your new room mate… Jimmy Hoffa.
- If you have a traumatic or medical emergency, call 911 and NOT 311. This shit happens all the time. Some tourist comes in, gets stabbed, and says, “Oh, I’ll just call the City of New York!” and dials the wrong number… and then they die. However just remember that when the ambulance arrives after calling the correct number, they’re going to take you to the hospital. That’s what they do because they are in essence an extension of the healthcare system. The ambulances will come in different sizes and shapes, but are all equipped equally and the personnel have the same training. Don’t worry about insurance or who’s going to pay for it, because ultimately your health comes first. Unless you’re Canadian in which case you’ll need to pay in cash upfront because your government won’t pay us for treating their citizens. We’ll also take Visa, MasterCard, and AMEX but there is a %5 additional service fee. Yes Canada, we blame you for our broken ass healthcare system.
In conclusion, please have a great time, thanks for coming, and be sure to take your trash with you when you leave.
*SMOOCHES* *BEOTCHES*
-NYCWD
Over two weeks ago I had a relatively old, yet new, experience.
For the first time I met bloggers that I had never met in person before.
Now let’s be honest… I’ve attended two TequilaCons, Brittcon, Avitable’s Halloween Party the last two years, I’ve been to a Dave event, a Ren event, and of course I am now madly in love with the first blogger I ever met. So it is a fact that I have indeed met other bloggers face to face before… but there was a difference this time.
This time, sure the other bloggers knew who I was as I knew who they were… but they really didn’t know me just as I really did not know much about them.
I met alot of people. Quite a few of them are people I’ve been reading for years and a few of them are more recently added reads. Everyone was open, friendly, and welcoming. For that matter, I literally shook the hand of someone who I would have classified as my Nemesis in the blogosphere… but he had no idea that it was me nor did I realize it was he until much later in the night. While I did figure out who he was… still not sure if he figured out who I am… which may or may not be a bad thing.
Sure there was talk about blog platforms, search engine optimization, favorite plug-ins. There was talk about favorite smart phone apps, and some specific and common themes and ideas that had found themselves spawned from online discussions. All the talk there were things you can hear at other blogger gatherings.
What was oddly absent was the talk about everything else. There was no talk about our significant others, children, or recent visits to a restaurant we had blogged about. There wasn’t any talk about personal hopes or personal dreams, personal inspirations or personal aspirations. The discussion there was oddly, at least to myself, absent of personal things.
It was the kind of conversation you would have with like minded co-workers.
It wasn’t the kind of conversation you would have with friends.
Was it bad? Not necessarily.
Was it good? Quite possibly.
It was definitely different… and it gave me a new found appreciation for the relationships I have built from this blog.
With that said, I think it’s only fair that I make a statement regarding the future of this blog.
It seems that once again people are closing up shop, changing URLs, looking for a chance to start anew. Some of them have told me where they are going… others have not. I understand this feeling… this need for a fresh start… this need to forget the past… this need to move beyond the current blog and whatever senseless drama may surround it. I understand this… because I have felt that way a few times myself.
With that in mind…
Tonight marks the one year anniversary for another family living in a different reality and the day the Internet got a tad bit dimmer…
So close, no matter how far
Couldn’t be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
and nothing else mattersNever opened myself this way
Life is ours, we live it our way
All these words I don’t just say
and nothing else matters
-Nothing Else Matters, Metallica
Hope you’re enjoying the backstage passes in Heaven… miss you Lisa…
categories: Blogging Blogger Meet-Ups TequilaCon 2009 Personal Memories
I know.
It’s been a week since landing in Florida.
It’s been 4 days since I’ve been back from Florida.
And there has been nary a blog peep from me.
The thing is… Poppy did such a great recap… what else could I possibly say?
Poppy Rawks with Mew
Floating Princess looks like a deer in headlights while Poppy swills back something else made by PJ
The Royal Court of the PRB will smile and like it!
Dave2 looks uber emo considering who he’s standing next to
I had a really good time reconnecting with friends I haven’t seen in a long time, meeting new people I’ve looked forward to meeting for a long time, and just relaxing in the sun. It’s important to remember this when you read the next part… so let me stress… I had a really good time.
But the truth is… it was different.
Maybe it’s because I was actually sober for this year’s party.
Maybe it’s because I knew which way things were so gone was that certain freshness and excitedness.
Maybe it’s because I didn’t spend an afternoon in a hotel bar surrounded by bloggers and Klingons and getting obliterated off margaritas.
I don’t know. I don’t know exactly what or how it was different other than the obvious… but it was.
What I do know is that when people try to push their morales upon me, or upon others in my presence, I get fucking annoyed.
What I do know is that I may have to abdicate my crown as the King of Drama, because to be honest, while it can be thrilling for the moment, people let it consume them… and life is too short to be consumed by such pettiness.
Those are my two big observations about how I think things were different.
Next year, the one thing that will definitely be different, is that I’m going to have a cooler in the back of my rental car packed with DiGiorno frozen pizzas… and I’ll be selling them at 2:00am for $20 a pop.
Now THAT is how you make money in blogging.
As I sit and write this post a full 12 hours after its occurrence… my hands shake and tremble from the air conditioner in the newly renovated hotel room.
One of my worst fears was realized yesterday. It is a fear shared by all photographers… amateur or pro.
My digital DSLR was taken from me.
Taken.
My digital DSLR was taken from me by Transportation Safety Agents at JFK International Airport yesterday.
It was taken from me and OUT OF MY SIGHT because it had to go through an X-Ray machine.
Bullshit TSA.
You took my camera. MY CAMERA.
Here’s what took place… minute by terrifying minute.
We got to the security check point. I was handed some plastic bins from a TSA Agent, an elderly gentleman who smiled with a nod when he gave them to me. I removed my laptop from it’s bag and placed it in it’s own bin. Then I took off my boots and emptied my pockets into another bin.
Then, as I was getting ready to walk through the metal detector, the TSA Agent stopped me! He stopped me and told me that the camera bag on my back that I had forgotten all about because of my absent mindedness had to go through the X-ray machine! What was worse, he did so nicely with a slight grandpa like grin! He was obviously mocking me by being nice!!!
I felt I had NO choice in the matter, even though it is clearly posted that this is what happens and I’ve done it a dozen times before.
So I did it.
I sent my camera bag through the metal detector where I lost sight of it! Once I walked through, clearing the metal detector, I waited for my camera bag. It came out… but the harm was done. I had lost sight of it! I had lost sight of it in a transparent walled area where the only opaque thing was the X-Ray machine!!! Who cares about the harmful rays coming out and frying us? We need to see in there!!!
I was feeling woozy, possibly from not eating. I gathered all my belongings at the other end, ran to the bathroom, crumbled to the floor, and popped my emergency M&M that I keep in my pocket for just such an occasion. Then the whole flight I had to think of how I was going to tell my story.
More importantly… how was I going to get PAID for my harrowing tale of kindness, politeness, and obvious security measures for the well being of both travelers and workers by the TSA!!!
I’m not sure how to end this post. I don’t know what my story will lead to but I needed to do more than file a compliment or write a letter. My hope is that this post of mine will be read by other photographers, passed along to journalists traveling with their cameras… most of all, my hope is that NO PHOTOGRAPHER HAS THEIR CAMERA TAKEN FROM THEM.
TSA TOOK MY CAMERA IN JFK AIRPORT NYC.
THIS SHOULD NEVER HAPPEN TO ANY PHOTOGRAPHER. EVER.
/sarcastic parodic story*
So yeah… we made it to Orlando. Hertz rental really needs to get their act together, but other than that… it was a good travel experience. We had dinner with some very esteemed Floridians, I got to assist at an undisclosed location doing discussable things, and I made out with LeSombre.
All in all… a great start to what promises to be a fantastic trip.
* The inspirational bullshit story can be found here and also read How The TSA Responded To Reputation Damaging Criticism that also happened to be a complete fabrication… unless your at #avitaween because then we have better things to do
