Yesterday I did the unthinkable. I left work early. Yes, that’s right, I actually said screw it and left at noon. Now consider the fact that during the year the only two holidays I actually ever take off is Christmas and the Fourth of July. I take Christmas off because, well, it is Christmas after all. I take the Fourth of July off because I was actually born on the Third of July (I missed being a patriot and having fireworks by something like 45 minutes) and that usually means I absolve my extra year in a bottle of Jack Daniels, which therefore leaves me a bit cross-eyed on the Fourth.
So yes, I left work early. Driving down Pennsylvania Avenue, I really wasn’t sure what I was going to do with myself. So I started making the calls. Kev answered his phone but was working. The Nick didn’t answer her phone, left a voicemail about going to IHOP. Barista was working, left a voicemail about stalking current Starbucks Employees with evidence of their love for Dunkin’ Donuts. The Steff didn’t answer her phone, left a voicemail about going to BJ’s Wholesale which is next to Old Navy on Erskine Street where she had wanted to go shopping for work clothes. The X-man didn’t answer, and there wasn’t a machine to leave a message. So, I decided no one else has done the unthinkable and I just go home and relax.
Around 1:30 The Steff calls me back. She just woke up. She’s also off for the day, and is do
wn to go shopping. So I pick her up at 2:30. In classic The Steff fashion she’s wearing blue jeans, a pink sweatshirt, a white vest with a furry collar, and her furry brown boots. She hands me back The Notebook DVD I lent her, and tells me how she cried her eyes out. She has gift certificates from Christmas to Sephora and Victoria’s Secret which she wants to use, so we decide to go to Austin Street instead. Of course there is a Barnes & Noble on Austin so I’m down with that.
I am extremely familiar with Austin Street, having started my EMS career with the Forest Hills Volunteer Ambulance Corps. Usually we would park at Continental Avenue and Austin Street, a place we called “Hollywood & Vine” due to the large amounts of human traffic and entertainment we would find there. Being surrounded by the private corporate streets of The Forest Hills Gardens and zoning laws that have remained unchanged, Austin Street has remained a center of commerce nostalgic of old time Main Street with independent shops and stores. In fact, the only true “mega” store is the Barnes & Noble, and that is at the far end of the strip.
So I catch a good parking spot on Continental Avenue and of course we end up scrambling for quarters. Once the hour and twenty minute parking time is secured, a shopping we go. Now honestly, this is the first time The Steff and I have specifically gone shopping. My ex hated going shopping with me. Usually I know what I want before I even go into a store, and things that catch my attention I’ll look at quickly and either it’s a yes or a no and I move on. Well, as luck would have it, apparently The Steff shops the same way.
First it was a shoe store, we walked in, looked at a few shoes and some boots, she tried nothing on, and we moved out. Then it was to Sephora, up and down the aisles with a sniff here and a sniff there, nothing catching her eye and boom we’re out again. Now it’s into another clothing store, there are some nice dresses she looks at, but once again nothing she tries on and nothing she’s in love with so off we go. Conversation is sporadic revolving around the stores, her new job, but she seems somewhat distracted.
The next store is Victoria’s Secret. Well, The Steff went in but I waited outside. Let’s face it, that store is not a store for women. It really is a candy store for men. For me to go into the candy store, and not have a reason to buy any candy, well that would be a little too much for me… and going in with The Steff would have been way over tempting. So I stood outside a smoked a cigarette (right, New Year’s resolution, I’m working on it, really). Now it takes me about 5 minutes to smoke one, and no sooner had I tossed it to the ground but she was back out. What a woman!
Then we end up at Bang-Bangs, which is a sort of club kid wear store. So she finds a shirt she likes, and a sweater… off to the changing room. Within a minute she’s showing me the first shirt, a green sheer clingy thing. She looks great, and I tell her so. Then she’s back in and out 30 seconds later with the sweater, no good in her mind but she looked fine to me, so I go and grab her the next size. She’s happier, and to be honest, it looked the same to me so I nod my agreement. Then boom, off to the counter and out we go.
Our next stop is a boot store at the very end of Austin Street by the church. We walk in, and the clerk and a woman are talking about how there would be such a huge market for leather good certified to be made from “found or sick” dead animals. The woman specifically names “cancer” as a great source of such leather. Right… I look at The Steff… she looks at me… and we leave. I would NOT wear any leather item that I consciously know came from a cancerous animal.
So now we head to the other side of Continental Avenue, the Barnes & Noble side. We stop at one shoe store where once again, it’s a quick in and out. Then across the street to the Bootery. She finds a boot she likes, asks if they have it in her size… the clerk tells her no, and boom we’re out again. On the next block she sees her friend Alex in the window of the gym working out and runs in to say hi. I once again smoke a cigarette… and I’m not even done before she’s back out.
So now we go to the GAP. Now I have always had a deep rooted hatred of the GAP (so deeply I refuse to even link to it), mainly because they NEVER have my size (I’m a big guy after all). She’s once again up and down the aisles and here is where she makes her announcement that shocks and awes me with the statement, “I’m trying to lighten up my wardrobe, it seems like all I have is black.” Right… ok… this coming from the girl in the pink sweatshirt with the white snow bunny vest. So it’s a pair of jeans… which I thought looked DAMN good on her, but she wasn’t feeling them… and out we go again.
Now it’s across the street to Mandees. Here we get to the dress socks she so desperately needs. See, The Steff has a thing for socks… the weirder the better. Unfortunately, where she works now, those socks aren’t doing the job. But once again… she grabbed five pairs for $12.00 and she’s ready to go out the door. Then she stops. See, Mandee’s has this rack next to the register with nostalgia candy and stuff. Well she spotted a box of mints with the Happy Bunny on it, with the word Poison scratched off and the words Mints For Friends scrawled on top. She went back for it. Okay, it only took fifteen seconds, so that is easily forgiven.
Finally we make it to B&N, and here’s where I basically took the lead, and hit the magazine rack. Grabbed the new issues of Writer’s Digest and Scrye, and off to the register. That’s when it happened. The reveal of what’s been going on in her mind and why she seemed so distracted:
So we move on from B&N and jump back into the truck to go to BJ’s Wholesale. We get there and I get on the line for the membership while she goes and grabs us two pretzels. They take this horrendous picture of me, print me out my new membership card, and now we’re off to the CD Players. I just want a CD player for where I have my new computer set-up at home. Something simple, which I find in cherry red for $30.00. We then go looking at some exercise machines and some organizers she thinks she may need for her shoes, but then once again we’re at the checkout.
On the way out of BJ’s we go to Sam Goody. I grab the new Depeche Mode and The Offspring Greatest Hits Album; she grabs Mariah Carey and Green Day. Another record breaking in and out, and we’re back in the truck heading towards her house. So I drop her off, and she says she’ll call me later, which of course she won’t… because she is The Steff. But as she leaves I look at the clock. It’s 5:30. This amazes me. I went to more stores, and accomplished more things with The Steff in 3 hours than I ever did with my ex-wife in 3 years.
So here’s the most important part of everything. I went home… plugged in my new radio… and proceeded to write 5,000 words in the story I’m currently suffering a block on (and no, it isn’t the story of The Steff’s life). I don’t know why this suddenly broke. I’m not sure why yesterday of all days I was able to sit there and with clarity pound out the words I wanted to say. Maybe it was the music. Maybe it was the fact that I was home early enough to stay awake to do it. Maybe… just maybe… it was The Steff.
Looking at this entry… wow… maybe this is the beginning of the end of the block after all.
Thanks babe.
So yes, I left work early. Driving down Pennsylvania Avenue, I really wasn’t sure what I was going to do with myself. So I started making the calls. Kev answered his phone but was working. The Nick didn’t answer her phone, left a voicemail about going to IHOP. Barista was working, left a voicemail about stalking current Starbucks Employees with evidence of their love for Dunkin’ Donuts. The Steff didn’t answer her phone, left a voicemail about going to BJ’s Wholesale which is next to Old Navy on Erskine Street where she had wanted to go shopping for work clothes. The X-man didn’t answer, and there wasn’t a machine to leave a message. So, I decided no one else has done the unthinkable and I just go home and relax.
Around 1:30 The Steff calls me back. She just woke up. She’s also off for the day, and is do
wn to go shopping. So I pick her up at 2:30. In classic The Steff fashion she’s wearing blue jeans, a pink sweatshirt, a white vest with a furry collar, and her furry brown boots. She hands me back The Notebook DVD I lent her, and tells me how she cried her eyes out. She has gift certificates from Christmas to Sephora and Victoria’s Secret which she wants to use, so we decide to go to Austin Street instead. Of course there is a Barnes & Noble on Austin so I’m down with that.I am extremely familiar with Austin Street, having started my EMS career with the Forest Hills Volunteer Ambulance Corps. Usually we would park at Continental Avenue and Austin Street, a place we called “Hollywood & Vine” due to the large amounts of human traffic and entertainment we would find there. Being surrounded by the private corporate streets of The Forest Hills Gardens and zoning laws that have remained unchanged, Austin Street has remained a center of commerce nostalgic of old time Main Street with independent shops and stores. In fact, the only true “mega” store is the Barnes & Noble, and that is at the far end of the strip.
So I catch a good parking spot on Continental Avenue and of course we end up scrambling for quarters. Once the hour and twenty minute parking time is secured, a shopping we go. Now honestly, this is the first time The Steff and I have specifically gone shopping. My ex hated going shopping with me. Usually I know what I want before I even go into a store, and things that catch my attention I’ll look at quickly and either it’s a yes or a no and I move on. Well, as luck would have it, apparently The Steff shops the same way.
First it was a shoe store, we walked in, looked at a few shoes and some boots, she tried nothing on, and we moved out. Then it was to Sephora, up and down the aisles with a sniff here and a sniff there, nothing catching her eye and boom we’re out again. Now it’s into another clothing store, there are some nice dresses she looks at, but once again nothing she tries on and nothing she’s in love with so off we go. Conversation is sporadic revolving around the stores, her new job, but she seems somewhat distracted.
The next store is Victoria’s Secret. Well, The Steff went in but I waited outside. Let’s face it, that store is not a store for women. It really is a candy store for men. For me to go into the candy store, and not have a reason to buy any candy, well that would be a little too much for me… and going in with The Steff would have been way over tempting. So I stood outside a smoked a cigarette (right, New Year’s resolution, I’m working on it, really). Now it takes me about 5 minutes to smoke one, and no sooner had I tossed it to the ground but she was back out. What a woman!
Then we end up at Bang-Bangs, which is a sort of club kid wear store. So she finds a shirt she likes, and a sweater… off to the changing room. Within a minute she’s showing me the first shirt, a green sheer clingy thing. She looks great, and I tell her so. Then she’s back in and out 30 seconds later with the sweater, no good in her mind but she looked fine to me, so I go and grab her the next size. She’s happier, and to be honest, it looked the same to me so I nod my agreement. Then boom, off to the counter and out we go.
Our next stop is a boot store at the very end of Austin Street by the church. We walk in, and the clerk and a woman are talking about how there would be such a huge market for leather good certified to be made from “found or sick” dead animals. The woman specifically names “cancer” as a great source of such leather. Right… I look at The Steff… she looks at me… and we leave. I would NOT wear any leather item that I consciously know came from a cancerous animal.
So now we head to the other side of Continental Avenue, the Barnes & Noble side. We stop at one shoe store where once again, it’s a quick in and out. Then across the street to the Bootery. She finds a boot she likes, asks if they have it in her size… the clerk tells her no, and boom we’re out again. On the next block she sees her friend Alex in the window of the gym working out and runs in to say hi. I once again smoke a cigarette… and I’m not even done before she’s back out.
So now we go to the GAP. Now I have always had a deep rooted hatred of the GAP (so deeply I refuse to even link to it), mainly because they NEVER have my size (I’m a big guy after all). She’s once again up and down the aisles and here is where she makes her announcement that shocks and awes me with the statement, “I’m trying to lighten up my wardrobe, it seems like all I have is black.” Right… ok… this coming from the girl in the pink sweatshirt with the white snow bunny vest. So it’s a pair of jeans… which I thought looked DAMN good on her, but she wasn’t feeling them… and out we go again.
Now it’s across the street to Mandees. Here we get to the dress socks she so desperately needs. See, The Steff has a thing for socks… the weirder the better. Unfortunately, where she works now, those socks aren’t doing the job. But once again… she grabbed five pairs for $12.00 and she’s ready to go out the door. Then she stops. See, Mandee’s has this rack next to the register with nostalgia candy and stuff. Well she spotted a box of mints with the Happy Bunny on it, with the word Poison scratched off and the words Mints For Friends scrawled on top. She went back for it. Okay, it only took fifteen seconds, so that is easily forgiven.
Finally we make it to B&N, and here’s where I basically took the lead, and hit the magazine rack. Grabbed the new issues of Writer’s Digest and Scrye, and off to the register. That’s when it happened. The reveal of what’s been going on in her mind and why she seemed so distracted:
“Hey, you know you should write another book,” she says to me as we walk through the aisle of the ropes to the checkout.So there it is… she’s rehooked on Officer Crumb. After some more conversing on the topic, she reveals that the New Guy had his hours changed and while he’s still a nice guy… well he does have some things she’s not crazy about. So we joke some more about it… how we could make it into a trilogy… and call it something like “The Scrapbook” in imitation of The Notebook. So we laugh about it… but inside I know she’s sick about the whole thing… and truth be told now I’m twisted over it too. I really need to get working on those New Year’s resolutions.
“Well, the last book I wrote wasn’t too well received,” I said joking (this is a private joke, and I know no one reading this will get it… she should have gotten it… but in reality she’s a blonde… so she didn’t get it either)
“Yeah, but, this book will be about me!” she says getting excited, “About me, and my life, and Officer Crumb.” (She doesn’t call him Officer Crumb, but I’ll be damned if I say his name much less write it)
So we move on from B&N and jump back into the truck to go to BJ’s Wholesale. We get there and I get on the line for the membership while she goes and grabs us two pretzels. They take this horrendous picture of me, print me out my new membership card, and now we’re off to the CD Players. I just want a CD player for where I have my new computer set-up at home. Something simple, which I find in cherry red for $30.00. We then go looking at some exercise machines and some organizers she thinks she may need for her shoes, but then once again we’re at the checkout.
On the way out of BJ’s we go to Sam Goody. I grab the new Depeche Mode and The Offspring Greatest Hits Album; she grabs Mariah Carey and Green Day. Another record breaking in and out, and we’re back in the truck heading towards her house. So I drop her off, and she says she’ll call me later, which of course she won’t… because she is The Steff. But as she leaves I look at the clock. It’s 5:30. This amazes me. I went to more stores, and accomplished more things with The Steff in 3 hours than I ever did with my ex-wife in 3 years.
So here’s the most important part of everything. I went home… plugged in my new radio… and proceeded to write 5,000 words in the story I’m currently suffering a block on (and no, it isn’t the story of The Steff’s life). I don’t know why this suddenly broke. I’m not sure why yesterday of all days I was able to sit there and with clarity pound out the words I wanted to say. Maybe it was the music. Maybe it was the fact that I was home early enough to stay awake to do it. Maybe… just maybe… it was The Steff.
Looking at this entry… wow… maybe this is the beginning of the end of the block after all.
Thanks babe.
New York has been pummeled under a sudden cold snap. It happened so quick, that the rain Saturday night turned into Sunday morning snow. Not good weather to be out in… hence I stayed home with DJ watching some Bob the Builder re-runs and trying to conquer Chicken Little on Xbox.
I did get some other things done yesterday. Most notable I spoke to Izabella online. We had one of those two hour conversations which ranged from what we had respectively done Saturday to the relative question of conversational topics. Basically… at what point do you know someone enough to talk about “adult” topics. IM relationships have never really been my strong point. Sure there are smilies, and the usual acronyms, but nothing really tells you how a conversation is going except for body language and tone… both items which are lacking in IMs unless webcams and VOIP is utilized.
The conversation we had, while tame in concept, raises a bigger issue. The de-humanization that occurs over the internet is something that we, as a generation (being Generation X) more than any other, have needed to learn how to cope and deal with. Nothing quite sums it up though as my most important question, “Are you over 18? Are you a cop?”. Luckily, she answered yes and no respectively… and I could carry on the conversation without fear of having ESU blow through my door.
I also did some old school journaling yesterday. Well… more like recollecting and reorganizing. I’ve put together all my notes from New Orleans with the pictures specifically from there. My next task will be to re-organize my Texas items. Then comes the task of trying to rework it all to form an outline for the memoir I want to write. Of course, with my luck, I’ll probably have three more deployments under my belt before I get done writing about these two.
Today, although it is Martin Luther King Jr. Day, I’m still at work. I did send my queries in for Scrye Issues #95/#96. I didn’t query for any new games though… I really haven’t had the time to invest in any or play any… although I will be getting a case of MW:Domination next week. Now THAT will be well worth a day off from it all. I am long overdue for a dose of my favorite plastic crack.
My Love of All Things Wolf
Personally, I just want to get the MAD CAT IV from Anastasia Kerensky’s Wolf Hunters. I’ve always ahd a love for all things Wolf Dragoons, and then by extension Clan Wolf, which by further extension the Steel Wolves, and now the fifth Wolf unit line (sixth if you count Clan Wolf In-Exile… but I really am not into that very minor Kell Hound abomination) in the Wolf Hunters which makes it’s special debut in Domination, but comes out full force in the May release Vanguard. Do I have a thing for the wolves? Yeah… I guess I do. So all you Jade Falcon or Ghost Bear fans out there… beware… because the Kerensky bloodline is once again returning to the Republic of the Sphere. With the wolves back in the fray… how long will Fortress Republic truly continue to stand? Not long is my guess.
I did get some other things done yesterday. Most notable I spoke to Izabella online. We had one of those two hour conversations which ranged from what we had respectively done Saturday to the relative question of conversational topics. Basically… at what point do you know someone enough to talk about “adult” topics. IM relationships have never really been my strong point. Sure there are smilies, and the usual acronyms, but nothing really tells you how a conversation is going except for body language and tone… both items which are lacking in IMs unless webcams and VOIP is utilized.
The conversation we had, while tame in concept, raises a bigger issue. The de-humanization that occurs over the internet is something that we, as a generation (being Generation X) more than any other, have needed to learn how to cope and deal with. Nothing quite sums it up though as my most important question, “Are you over 18? Are you a cop?”. Luckily, she answered yes and no respectively… and I could carry on the conversation without fear of having ESU blow through my door.
I also did some old school journaling yesterday. Well… more like recollecting and reorganizing. I’ve put together all my notes from New Orleans with the pictures specifically from there. My next task will be to re-organize my Texas items. Then comes the task of trying to rework it all to form an outline for the memoir I want to write. Of course, with my luck, I’ll probably have three more deployments under my belt before I get done writing about these two.
Today, although it is Martin Luther King Jr. Day, I’m still at work. I did send my queries in for Scrye Issues #95/#96. I didn’t query for any new games though… I really haven’t had the time to invest in any or play any… although I will be getting a case of MW:Domination next week. Now THAT will be well worth a day off from it all. I am long overdue for a dose of my favorite plastic crack.
My Love of All Things Wolf
Personally, I just want to get the MAD CAT IV from Anastasia Kerensky’s Wolf Hunters. I’ve always ahd a love for all things Wolf Dragoons, and then by extension Clan Wolf, which by further extension the Steel Wolves, and now the fifth Wolf unit line (sixth if you count Clan Wolf In-Exile… but I really am not into that very minor Kell Hound abomination) in the Wolf Hunters which makes it’s special debut in Domination, but comes out full force in the May release Vanguard. Do I have a thing for the wolves? Yeah… I guess I do. So all you Jade Falcon or Ghost Bear fans out there… beware… because the Kerensky bloodline is once again returning to the Republic of the Sphere. With the wolves back in the fray… how long will Fortress Republic truly continue to stand? Not long is my guess.
EMS is a relatively small world within New York City. Usually, everyone defines the NYC EMS system as the Fire Department of New York. What most people would probably find surprising is that the FDNY is only responsible for maybe 30% of all the ambulances in the city.
In addition to FDNY there is what we call Voluntary Hospitals that operate units within the 911 system. The FDNY only operates 51% of the 600 something tours (a tour equals 8 in service hours) a day in the city 911 system, with the other 49% belonging to the Voluntaries. Then there are approximately 12 private ambulance companies operating in the city. A very rough estimate puts the private ambulances at roughly 500 tours a day combined. In addition to that, there are the 15 still active Volunteer Ambulance Corps that operate on a mostly part time and sporadic schedule.
Seems pretty big right? Well, not really. See, there is an awful lot of cross working. It isn’t uncommon for someone to work for the FDNY and a Voluntary Hospital, or work for two or more Voluntary Hospitals, or even for FDNY or a Voluntary and also work at a Private. Of course, there are the extremists who work for FDNY, a Voluntary, and a Private… but that is a rarer breed because the FDNY Union is totally against the Privates. So usually, if you come across someone in one shop, chances are you’ll run across them at another as well.
So, last night, after getting done with my job at my Private, I logged in at 23:00 at my Voluntary. All night the rain was on and off… and at sometimes a downright torrential downpour bordering Hurricane conditions. My usual truck, 51D has been removed from the system since May of this year, so I’ve basically been bouncing around wherever the work is in the network of Voluntaries I work for. This is somewhat of a hassle, but I do get to see the different sights and am rarely bored by it.
So at around 1:00am this morning I end up on the corner of Myrtle Avenue and Catalpa Avenue for a drug. Medics rolled up a few minutes later as we were loading “Felix”, the undomiciled drunkard into the back of the truck. I knew both medics, one I had worked the same area in Queens with and the other was a guy I actually trained back in 1996 and who eventually ended up working for me on the weekends in 1997 while he went to medic school. It was good to see both of them, and we compared notes on anything new in either our lives, the area, and of course the industry. So we transported the patient, and told them we’d see them later for coffee.
At around 3:00am this morning, I ended up backing up the same medics on an unresponsive that turned into a cardiac arrest. While enroute, the dispatcher advised that it was the family member of a Member of Service (MOS). Arriving on scene, we grabbed our scoop stretcher and headed into the house. Up the narrow staircase we went, past some shoes, piles of clothes, and a mattress turned on its side. When we got to the small room at the top of the stairs, I recognized the person holding the IV bag for the medics. It was one of my old partners from back in 1995. The patient was his father.
The medics ran through their standing orders while my partner and I pumped and blew. Than we carried the patient down the flight on the scoop, out to the ambulance, and off to the hospital. Thirty minutes or so later, he was pronounced deceased at the hospital. I spoke briefly with my old partner, and we agreed to try and keep in touch better than we had… but it made me think and ponder a bit.
To be honest, I had had recent thoughts about leaving the industry. In fact, back in August I was ready to move on the first of this year. Going down to New Orleans for Katrina, and Sabine County for Rita kind of changed that a bit… but the idea was still lurking seeing as how I’ll need to enroll in a refresher class next year. It will be my fourth refresher… signaling the conclusion of 12 years.
Yet… there’s something about the job. Something about the camaraderie when you show up with people who have been doing this as long if not longer than you that just makes everything go smoother. Of course, there’s also the fact that you never really know who you’re going to meet or help… someone you may know, someone you may not, or someone you may get to know who might change your life forever.
In addition to FDNY there is what we call Voluntary Hospitals that operate units within the 911 system. The FDNY only operates 51% of the 600 something tours (a tour equals 8 in service hours) a day in the city 911 system, with the other 49% belonging to the Voluntaries. Then there are approximately 12 private ambulance companies operating in the city. A very rough estimate puts the private ambulances at roughly 500 tours a day combined. In addition to that, there are the 15 still active Volunteer Ambulance Corps that operate on a mostly part time and sporadic schedule.
Seems pretty big right? Well, not really. See, there is an awful lot of cross working. It isn’t uncommon for someone to work for the FDNY and a Voluntary Hospital, or work for two or more Voluntary Hospitals, or even for FDNY or a Voluntary and also work at a Private. Of course, there are the extremists who work for FDNY, a Voluntary, and a Private… but that is a rarer breed because the FDNY Union is totally against the Privates. So usually, if you come across someone in one shop, chances are you’ll run across them at another as well.
So, last night, after getting done with my job at my Private, I logged in at 23:00 at my Voluntary. All night the rain was on and off… and at sometimes a downright torrential downpour bordering Hurricane conditions. My usual truck, 51D has been removed from the system since May of this year, so I’ve basically been bouncing around wherever the work is in the network of Voluntaries I work for. This is somewhat of a hassle, but I do get to see the different sights and am rarely bored by it.
So at around 1:00am this morning I end up on the corner of Myrtle Avenue and Catalpa Avenue for a drug. Medics rolled up a few minutes later as we were loading “Felix”, the undomiciled drunkard into the back of the truck. I knew both medics, one I had worked the same area in Queens with and the other was a guy I actually trained back in 1996 and who eventually ended up working for me on the weekends in 1997 while he went to medic school. It was good to see both of them, and we compared notes on anything new in either our lives, the area, and of course the industry. So we transported the patient, and told them we’d see them later for coffee.
At around 3:00am this morning, I ended up backing up the same medics on an unresponsive that turned into a cardiac arrest. While enroute, the dispatcher advised that it was the family member of a Member of Service (MOS). Arriving on scene, we grabbed our scoop stretcher and headed into the house. Up the narrow staircase we went, past some shoes, piles of clothes, and a mattress turned on its side. When we got to the small room at the top of the stairs, I recognized the person holding the IV bag for the medics. It was one of my old partners from back in 1995. The patient was his father.
The medics ran through their standing orders while my partner and I pumped and blew. Than we carried the patient down the flight on the scoop, out to the ambulance, and off to the hospital. Thirty minutes or so later, he was pronounced deceased at the hospital. I spoke briefly with my old partner, and we agreed to try and keep in touch better than we had… but it made me think and ponder a bit.
To be honest, I had had recent thoughts about leaving the industry. In fact, back in August I was ready to move on the first of this year. Going down to New Orleans for Katrina, and Sabine County for Rita kind of changed that a bit… but the idea was still lurking seeing as how I’ll need to enroll in a refresher class next year. It will be my fourth refresher… signaling the conclusion of 12 years.
Yet… there’s something about the job. Something about the camaraderie when you show up with people who have been doing this as long if not longer than you that just makes everything go smoother. Of course, there’s also the fact that you never really know who you’re going to meet or help… someone you may know, someone you may not, or someone you may get to know who might change your life forever.
I am so drained. Friday has just taken the gusto out of my sails. I spent over six hours on the boards today, which in itself will suck the life out of you. Tonight I have 8 hours on a truck in the Hills, which I actually look forward to. Of course, there’s also the “drama” as Princess Pottymouth had put it.
So last night I got home late. Around 1:00am I’m climbing into bed… my head is hitting the pillow… and I’m done. At 2:00am the c-phone rings that wonderful song, “Breaking the Habit” by Linkin’ Park. It’s The Steff. She’s just calling to say hi… because ever sin
ce she started working again she’s gone totally nocturnal. She tries to hurry up and say goodnight because she knows she has once again woken me up… but I slam the brakes on her and press for what’s bothering her. Bottom line: Officer Crumb. She’s still hooked on him. So I listen… and I sympathize because I know what that’s TOTALLY like… and tell her how much better off she is without him
She admits she’s in her moody ways… but I know no matter what I say it won’t help even though she says it does. We end up talking about her friend, and her relationship. I give her my standing advice on it (all men suck… but if you want it bad enough… you can get it) and we say goodnight.
Now it is 2:30 in the morning… and I’m laying awake looking at the ceiling… thinking about so many things that ultimately weigh on my mind. My relationship with The Steff… my relationship with Christine (who I still haven’t heard from)… my relationship with The Nick… and the list just goes on. So what do I do? Right… I turn on the television and fall asleep in the middle of Hellboy.
Hellboy is a great movie. I love the music when they pull up in the garbage truck to the museum. I loved Selma Blair in it… ever since Cruel Intentions I’ve had a thing for her. I find Hellboy the ULTIMATE love story… and someone I can relate with. The part where he’s trying to write Liz (Selma Blair) and tell her how he feels… me. The part where he’s on a rooftop spying on her… yeah, me. The part where he breaks off his horns and forsakes his true nature to save her… yes… me as well. To me, that is true love. That is unconditional love. Yet… they are never meant to be.
So, as the familiar music played in the background, and I drifted off to sleep… I questioned if all of this was never meant to be…
…And I woke up still wondering. Then of course… the day ran its course… and now I’m tir
ed… sitting at work. The Nick decides to start her stuff again. When I say that… I mean she starts teasing me. The whole “I need a massage”, followed by “We need to go shopping” ended with “Well, Monday’s no good because I’m playing the role of the good daughter”. Right… see… that’s the thing… she’s teasing. She claims to be a commitment phobe. Maybe she is… but then why whine about not having a boyfriend to lift a tv??? I was in no mood to play our usual antics tonight… so I called her out on it… and she did her loopy reply… which I came back at her hard reminding her that all of this was her choice… and that was that. So she’s mad at me now. Oh well. I call it how I see it… and never promised to fudge on anything I ever said or did. To a large extent there are times when I am brutally honest… but more to be brutal than to be honest. This was one of those times.
I don’t think I feel as lonely anymore… although I know I’m as alone as ever. Maybe I’m just getting used to it again. Which also means I’ll probably become grumpy again… something to watch out for. Actually… I think I may already have started.
By the way… Happy Friday the 13th everyone… glad to see my luck hasn’t changed any…
So last night I got home late. Around 1:00am I’m climbing into bed… my head is hitting the pillow… and I’m done. At 2:00am the c-phone rings that wonderful song, “Breaking the Habit” by Linkin’ Park. It’s The Steff. She’s just calling to say hi… because ever sin
ce she started working again she’s gone totally nocturnal. She tries to hurry up and say goodnight because she knows she has once again woken me up… but I slam the brakes on her and press for what’s bothering her. Bottom line: Officer Crumb. She’s still hooked on him. So I listen… and I sympathize because I know what that’s TOTALLY like… and tell her how much better off she is without himShe admits she’s in her moody ways… but I know no matter what I say it won’t help even though she says it does. We end up talking about her friend, and her relationship. I give her my standing advice on it (all men suck… but if you want it bad enough… you can get it) and we say goodnight.
Now it is 2:30 in the morning… and I’m laying awake looking at the ceiling… thinking about so many things that ultimately weigh on my mind. My relationship with The Steff… my relationship with Christine (who I still haven’t heard from)… my relationship with The Nick… and the list just goes on. So what do I do? Right… I turn on the television and fall asleep in the middle of Hellboy.
Hellboy is a great movie. I love the music when they pull up in the garbage truck to the museum. I loved Selma Blair in it… ever since Cruel Intentions I’ve had a thing for her. I find Hellboy the ULTIMATE love story… and someone I can relate with. The part where he’s trying to write Liz (Selma Blair) and tell her how he feels… me. The part where he’s on a rooftop spying on her… yeah, me. The part where he breaks off his horns and forsakes his true nature to save her… yes… me as well. To me, that is true love. That is unconditional love. Yet… they are never meant to be.
So, as the familiar music played in the background, and I drifted off to sleep… I questioned if all of this was never meant to be…
…And I woke up still wondering. Then of course… the day ran its course… and now I’m tir
ed… sitting at work. The Nick decides to start her stuff again. When I say that… I mean she starts teasing me. The whole “I need a massage”, followed by “We need to go shopping” ended with “Well, Monday’s no good because I’m playing the role of the good daughter”. Right… see… that’s the thing… she’s teasing. She claims to be a commitment phobe. Maybe she is… but then why whine about not having a boyfriend to lift a tv??? I was in no mood to play our usual antics tonight… so I called her out on it… and she did her loopy reply… which I came back at her hard reminding her that all of this was her choice… and that was that. So she’s mad at me now. Oh well. I call it how I see it… and never promised to fudge on anything I ever said or did. To a large extent there are times when I am brutally honest… but more to be brutal than to be honest. This was one of those times.I don’t think I feel as lonely anymore… although I know I’m as alone as ever. Maybe I’m just getting used to it again. Which also means I’ll probably become grumpy again… something to watch out for. Actually… I think I may already have started.
By the way… Happy Friday the 13th everyone… glad to see my luck hasn’t changed any…
Well… it seems Princess Pottymouth is a little upset over my new banner at BE. Here’s her posting after seeing it in rotation.
Now… here’s the real important part… read the comments made in the post. Notice specifically that Bitter Bitch says, “I want to be just like you when I grow up. And I want my avatar on someone’s banner dammit!”
Ask… and yee shall receive my dear…
Now… here’s the real important part… read the comments made in the post. Notice specifically that Bitter Bitch says, “I want to be just like you when I grow up. And I want my avatar on someone’s banner dammit!”
Ask… and yee shall receive my dear…
Oh… and just for the record… while I would have to say I enjoy the bustier… I have a thing against blondes… but I do love redheads…
