Throughout the course of history world leaders have done a number of things to garner attention to their cause. Well… this one is mine. I am therefore going on a blogging strike until 8 more people sign up for the forums at Did I Say That? See… T was hoping for 50 people by Monday… and I’ll be darned to heck if I didn’t do everything in my power to try and make that happen… if not for her then for her daughter who turns the big old 3 on that day.
So if you haven’t come over and hung out with us at the forums… which by the way right now has over 1,500 posts which just PROVES we are a chatty bunch… well then get over there. If you are over… well start getting your friends involved too. I will remain silent here at APODB until the 50th member is signed up… which if I’m as popular as I think I am may be a really long time… but you should also remember that this will be endangering Ooogle Monday… and what a Monday I had in store for you all!
Go sign up here now… or at the very least go see her because she isn’t striking and is already a member.
So the Rent My Blog Analysis got a lot of feedback which I think qualifies for an update rather than going in and just editing the original post. The two things this update will do is 1) Better explain the formula I devised and 2) Address a few things some people pointed out.
The Formula Redeux
For those of you who don’t know Miss Ann Thrope… well your missing out. I suggest you click and become familiarized with her and take some lessons. Miss Ann felt my formula was fatally flawed and that she in fact would not measure up to anything higher than a slumlord. In fact, her exact comment to be summed up was, “So pretty much for 15 credits, my average of 60 unique clicks and maybe a mention or two sucks. Somehow i don’t think so. “
Luckily, she rented to me for a week so I could see first hand what it was like to stay at her place (which is really nice by the way… mega soft pillows and plenty of pussies for me to chase around the yard).
So I will now demonstrate the formula step by step using my rental time at Miss Ann Thrope’s. The Rent My Blog Stats for that stay are as follows: Hits: 1226, Unique Hits: 361, Clicks: 91, Unique Clicks: 65, and Credits: 15. Now over the course of the week Miss Ann mentioned me in 3 different posts with the Rent My Blog link. I was mentioned on 5/13 “It’s an Aries Thing”, 5/14 “Couple of Things”, and 5/16 “Could be worse, could be… errr”. Now for those of you who read those posts… look at the end for comments about “cool bitchy dude” and look at the link. It’s the rent code. Some people may say “Oh, but she didn’t mention your name or say anything real about your blog”… well besides the point that I made in my original analysis about people linking to their renter’s secretly, I think being called a bitchy dude is probably the absolute best description I have heard of myself in almost forever… which is just proof she knows me. So total number of mentions is now 3.
So now let’s start plugging numbers with their values. The Hit numbers get thrown out. If someone wants to advertise on a site for impressions then they’ll be using a 468X60 banner and not a 150X150 square. Hits have NOTHING to do with Rent My Blog other than it show the % of traffic clicking through.
Clicks: 91. I subtract the number of Unique Clicks (65) from the total number of Clicks (91) to give me the number of repeat clickers of 26. Since those are repeat clicks they do not get a full credit, so it is multipled by .5 which gives me a non-unique click value of 13. We will call this Variable A.
Unique Clicks: 65. A Unique Click has a value of 1. It’s a 1:1 value deal. We will call this Variable B.
# of Mentions by Entry: 3. As I pointed out above I was mentioned and linked to in 3 separate posts. The value of 1 mention is 25, so in this case 25 multiplied by 3 equals a total mention value of 75. We will call this Variable C.
Now we will pull the formula together. We start by adding A+B+C=D… D is now a variable equal to the Total Value. Using the numbers from this rental it becomes 13+65+75= 153. Now to discover the percentage of return we take the Total Value, which is variable D, and divide it by Credits which in this case is 15. So the equation now become D/Credits. In this case it is 153/15= 10.2. Now we make it into a percentage by moving the decimal point two places to the right… which makes 10.2 into 1020%. For those of you curious about hits… simply divide the number of Unique Clicks by the number of Unique Hits. In this case it is 361/91=.180… move those decimal points… and the click through % of Unique Hits at Miss Ann Thrope’s is 18%.
So for a cost of 15 BE credits I received a total of 91 Clicks, 65 Unique Clicks, three men
tions as a “cool bitchy dude” which resulted in a 1,020% return on my initial investment. This makes Miss Ann Thrope the Queen of Rent My Blog. Long Rent the Queen!!! So there ya go Miss Ann… there’s your ranking and your explanation. I hope it was thorough enough… and if you decide you still don’t understand then let’s try this novel idea… just trust me that I do know what I’m talking about and that your the Queen of it all!Some Random Arguments:
- Positioning of Rental Space: I did not include taking into account exactly WHERE the rental box is. Some people have it “above the fold”, some have it half-way down the sidebar, and others have it at the very bottom. I relate the location of the rent code to what type of room you would place your guest. Do you give them the guest room on the top floor, make them sleep in the living room in the middle of it all, or stuff their corpses into the basement with the sewer rats. Usually a good indicator once again in clicks. Those at the top of the tower will receive more attention than those in the dungeoun… although if somebody does stick you in the dungeoun you could very well get as much attention as any other.
- Permanent Links: There are a few blogs that add their previous renters permanently into their blogrolls. Now I would normally say that is absolutely worth something… but then we would get into the argument of how much a blogroll link actually is. I know there was this other guy who came up with a forumula and a way for figuring out how much your own blog was worth based on the value of links… but links alone do not bring value. Clicks do… and since I can find no fair way of rating blogroll links or to know how many people click on the blogroll… well it needs to be excluded.
- Impressions versus clicks: As I mentioned in my original analysis, 1 BE credit equals 1 visit. Some people apparently are judgeing their worth based on 1 BE credit equals 40 impressions which is basically what BE charges for banner impressions. The problem with this ideology is that those banner impressions are 468X60 pixels which is 28,080 pixels. The thumbnail for Rent My Blog is what, let’s say 150X150 pixels? That equals 22,500 pixels that shorts you around 5-6k pixels of space… and which by the way you cannot decide what it says… it is simply a picture of your blog. If I was after impressions… I’d just do a banner.
It is once again that time of the week where I honor my tenant. This week’s guest of honor is Some Girl. Have you figured it out about her yet? Well you should be looking closely… VERY closely. Just don’t get too close because she has now joined a Kickball League… and she packs Some wallop!!! Go see her and tell her how much you love the fact that she’s staying with me!
Unlike last week, I have quite a few people I’d like to thank for letting me stay at their places. I guess my outcry worked a bit because Angels and Demons, The Adventures of Doghouse Reilly, and my current roomy here Some Girl all took me in this week. The first person to take me in last week as I was teetering on tired paws was Miss Ann Thrope. Miss Ann had mentioned the fact that she had read my Rent My Blog Analysis and wanted to know how she ranked. Well my stay over there isn’t over yet… and I will be providing an update to that expose’… but preliminarily I have to saw WOW!!! I think we will be having a new Queen of Rent My Blog.
Finally… I want to make mention of another blogger who I really feel for. Stephanie over at I Ended Up Here… How? has had problems renting space on blogs. I know how that feels… I’m about a 1 rental for every 10 bids I place. So go see Stephanie, seeing as how she’s a bit homeless right now… or even better… if she bids on your blog give her a home! Her credits are good!!! Really!
Now for the Friday Drama Update… which I know no one really cares about but me… but that’s okay because this is my blog and I’ll write about it if I want to!
So The Nick has been having some health issues lately. Saturday was a migraine, Monday was the sniffles, last night and tonight a full blown cold… so she’s been miserable. Not really miserable to me… but just miserable in general. Monday night, while hanging with the Pyro Guys Reid and Kevyn, well the three of us (she wasn’t included) decided we will no longer call Musclehead by Musclehead. Instead we will now call him Goldberg… after Bill Goldberg the former wrestler. Needless to say… he is still being held at bay. However, tonight I was privy to a text message she received. It was short, sweet, to the point of I miss you… from Reid the Pyro Guy. I sense an explosion waiting to happen.
Things with The Donkey and The Steff continue to progress. For the first time in a long time I sense general happiness from her… which is very important. What is more impressive, is that she met his mom. Now what you have to understand is that NO ONE meets Mama Donkey. I met her once 8 years ago by chance… and in the 11 years I’ve known him I can honestly say I’ve never been over his house. So the fact that she met his mom is HUGE. She did admit that they almost got into a borderline fight over their meeting.
The Steff is very sensitive about these types of things (families… she is very very very family oriented)… and Mama Donkey also seems the nervous type. So that night Donkey’s sister wasn’t feeling well and called in dead from going to dinner with them… which made Mama Donkey flinch… and The Steff hyperventlate thinking Mama didn’t want to meet her. Luckily, The Donkey pulled the rabbit out of the hat and instead of going out to dinner, they just brought some carrot cake home. As predicted by myself while stirring some tea leaves Mama Donkey loves The Steff and vice versa.
Now for a final bit of drama… remember The Steff’s New Guy B who got deaded awhile ago? Well he was best friends with my old partner Sir Shortness’s boyfriend. So Sir Shortness calls me yesterday. She’s been out for a few months now with a back injury… and it turns out that she needs surgery. Not a simple procedure either… the type where they cut her throat open, push aside her trachea and esophogaus, and then repair her damaged vertebrae that way. It’s a C3-C4 compression fracture for those who care.
So of course I tell her not to worry about going to and coming from the surgery… hell I only have 150 ambulances at my command on a daily basis so I think I can get her a ride… but then she starts crying on the phone. She’s scared. Oh hell… I’d be scared too. She does tell me that her and her boyfriend are still going, and she says that he isn’t up her ass like her past boyfriends and that’s good, and I know she’s lying. She needs him to be there… and he isn’t. We finally get off that topic and onto her cat Jack, and a few dozen other things… and then she mentions The Steff and asked if I still talk to her… idiot I am doesn’t realize it and says, “Oh yeah at least once a day.” (which is sort of true… well… we talk to each other’s voicemails alot)… and then I realize what’s next… New Guy B. So as she starts asking me about The Steff I signal to eVil… and he pages me overhead for a STAT… phew! That’s a conversation I hope to avoid for a long time.
In non-drama related news though… this week was National EMS Week. Toni
ght there was an awards ceremony… and seeing as how I LOVE those… I boycotted. I did hear from my other old partner and long time friend Freakzilla that I got a standing ovation though and they threw a classic picture of me in front of the Hemphill Town sign up on the screen. Of course I had provided the picture but didn’t know what it was being used for. No one had bothered to check if I would be there… and it took a minute for them to realize I wasn’t there. I find it incredulous that these people really have absolutely no idea how I am after 12 years.
Of course by the time they realized I wasn’t coming, Freakzilla had taken to the stage to accept on my behalf. His acceptance speech was very eloquent and this is EXACTLY what he said, “On behalf of Dog I would like to accept this. He wants to thank all those who went with him and a big A-WOOF to everyone who he hopes to see in twelve days and counting for the next season!”
That’s my nigga. I wouldn’t have said it better myself.
Unlike last week, I have quite a few people I’d like to thank for letting me stay at their places. I guess my outcry worked a bit because Angels and Demons, The Adventures of Doghouse Reilly, and my current roomy here Some Girl all took me in this week. The first person to take me in last week as I was teetering on tired paws was Miss Ann Thrope. Miss Ann had mentioned the fact that she had read my Rent My Blog Analysis and wanted to know how she ranked. Well my stay over there isn’t over yet… and I will be providing an update to that expose’… but preliminarily I have to saw WOW!!! I think we will be having a new Queen of Rent My Blog.
Finally… I want to make mention of another blogger who I really feel for. Stephanie over at I Ended Up Here… How? has had problems renting space on blogs. I know how that feels… I’m about a 1 rental for every 10 bids I place. So go see Stephanie, seeing as how she’s a bit homeless right now… or even better… if she bids on your blog give her a home! Her credits are good!!! Really!
.:*:.
Now for the Friday Drama Update… which I know no one really cares about but me… but that’s okay because this is my blog and I’ll write about it if I want to!
So The Nick has been having some health issues lately. Saturday was a migraine, Monday was the sniffles, last night and tonight a full blown cold… so she’s been miserable. Not really miserable to me… but just miserable in general. Monday night, while hanging with the Pyro Guys Reid and Kevyn, well the three of us (she wasn’t included) decided we will no longer call Musclehead by Musclehead. Instead we will now call him Goldberg… after Bill Goldberg the former wrestler. Needless to say… he is still being held at bay. However, tonight I was privy to a text message she received. It was short, sweet, to the point of I miss you… from Reid the Pyro Guy. I sense an explosion waiting to happen.
Things with The Donkey and The Steff continue to progress. For the first time in a long time I sense general happiness from her… which is very important. What is more impressive, is that she met his mom. Now what you have to understand is that NO ONE meets Mama Donkey. I met her once 8 years ago by chance… and in the 11 years I’ve known him I can honestly say I’ve never been over his house. So the fact that she met his mom is HUGE. She did admit that they almost got into a borderline fight over their meeting.
The Steff is very sensitive about these types of things (families… she is very very very family oriented)… and Mama Donkey also seems the nervous type. So that night Donkey’s sister wasn’t feeling well and called in dead from going to dinner with them… which made Mama Donkey flinch… and The Steff hyperventlate thinking Mama didn’t want to meet her. Luckily, The Donkey pulled the rabbit out of the hat and instead of going out to dinner, they just brought some carrot cake home. As predicted by myself while stirring some tea leaves Mama Donkey loves The Steff and vice versa.
Now for a final bit of drama… remember The Steff’s New Guy B who got deaded awhile ago? Well he was best friends with my old partner Sir Shortness’s boyfriend. So Sir Shortness calls me yesterday. She’s been out for a few months now with a back injury… and it turns out that she needs surgery. Not a simple procedure either… the type where they cut her throat open, push aside her trachea and esophogaus, and then repair her damaged vertebrae that way. It’s a C3-C4 compression fracture for those who care.
So of course I tell her not to worry about going to and coming from the surgery… hell I only have 150 ambulances at my command on a daily basis so I think I can get her a ride… but then she starts crying on the phone. She’s scared. Oh hell… I’d be scared too. She does tell me that her and her boyfriend are still going, and she says that he isn’t up her ass like her past boyfriends and that’s good, and I know she’s lying. She needs him to be there… and he isn’t. We finally get off that topic and onto her cat Jack, and a few dozen other things… and then she mentions The Steff and asked if I still talk to her… idiot I am doesn’t realize it and says, “Oh yeah at least once a day.” (which is sort of true… well… we talk to each other’s voicemails alot)… and then I realize what’s next… New Guy B. So as she starts asking me about The Steff I signal to eVil… and he pages me overhead for a STAT… phew! That’s a conversation I hope to avoid for a long time.
.:*:.
In non-drama related news though… this week was National EMS Week. Toni
ght there was an awards ceremony… and seeing as how I LOVE those… I boycotted. I did hear from my other old partner and long time friend Freakzilla that I got a standing ovation though and they threw a classic picture of me in front of the Hemphill Town sign up on the screen. Of course I had provided the picture but didn’t know what it was being used for. No one had bothered to check if I would be there… and it took a minute for them to realize I wasn’t there. I find it incredulous that these people really have absolutely no idea how I am after 12 years.Of course by the time they realized I wasn’t coming, Freakzilla had taken to the stage to accept on my behalf. His acceptance speech was very eloquent and this is EXACTLY what he said, “On behalf of Dog I would like to accept this. He wants to thank all those who went with him and a big A-WOOF to everyone who he hopes to see in twelve days and counting for the next season!”
That’s my nigga. I wouldn’t have said it better myself.
So today is Fuck Off And Die Thursday! Finally! Where should we start…
Let’s start with the moron in Dunkin Donuts. Every other day I’m there and I order the EXACT same thing. Every time you have to ask me three times what I want… and still you give me milk and not cream!!! Tomorrow… if I don’t get the cream… your getting the coffee… IN YOUR FACE! So FOAD Dunkin Dipshit!!!
Now let’s move on to random drug testing policies. It is truly amazing how certain people will come up on the “computer” the day after they called the Purchasing Agent a cheap bastard (well… if the shoe fits… then leave it and get the one that doesn’t for 50% off asswipe). So after 12 years suddenly the number comes up! FOAD computer… which by the way EVERYONE knows still is not working… so we know the “computer” is a breathing being who just happens to have lunch EVERY DAY with the Asswipe Purchasing Agent!!! And on that subject FOAD all idiots who KNOW that randoms can happen, but decide to smoke a joint anyway ‘cause “it’s there”… and then REFUSE the test because it violates their “belief system”. Newsflash idiot… we deal with peoples LIVES here… so if you can’t do it straight… don’t do it!!!
To tho
se people who don’t think that us Cr@ck@ @$$3$ can’t be pimps. Well I got news for ya’ll… it’s hard out here for a pimp… but it’s harder out here for us Cr@ck@z… and ya’ll need to show some R-E-S-P-E-C-T!!! Ya’ll need to R-E-C-O-G-N-I-Z-E!!! And stop being up our @$$3$ over EVERYTHING!!! We wiznill not go quietly into tha nizzay . Put ya mutha fuckin choppers up if ya feel this.. We will not be wiped from tha face of this earth coz of tha color of our skizzay . You’se a flea and I’m the big dogg. We will not be sent ta our beds witout our baller… or fo` tizzle motherfucka witout our dessert whizzich means yo woman!!! Dizzy blame us coz we treat our ladies right n dont pusha KFC as 5-star din’n!!! So FOAD all you h@t3rs!
Finally let us say FOAD to those people out there who feel the need to know EVERY LITTLE DETAIL of something I’M DOING. There is a REASON that I AM the one DOING IT. If you need to know about it then I will tell you… otherwise… Fuck Off And Die!!!
If you too are a FOAD Blogger and keeping it real… well link up here…
Let’s start with the moron in Dunkin Donuts. Every other day I’m there and I order the EXACT same thing. Every time you have to ask me three times what I want… and still you give me milk and not cream!!! Tomorrow… if I don’t get the cream… your getting the coffee… IN YOUR FACE! So FOAD Dunkin Dipshit!!!
Now let’s move on to random drug testing policies. It is truly amazing how certain people will come up on the “computer” the day after they called the Purchasing Agent a cheap bastard (well… if the shoe fits… then leave it and get the one that doesn’t for 50% off asswipe). So after 12 years suddenly the number comes up! FOAD computer… which by the way EVERYONE knows still is not working… so we know the “computer” is a breathing being who just happens to have lunch EVERY DAY with the Asswipe Purchasing Agent!!! And on that subject FOAD all idiots who KNOW that randoms can happen, but decide to smoke a joint anyway ‘cause “it’s there”… and then REFUSE the test because it violates their “belief system”. Newsflash idiot… we deal with peoples LIVES here… so if you can’t do it straight… don’t do it!!!
To tho
se people who don’t think that us Cr@ck@ @$$3$ can’t be pimps. Well I got news for ya’ll… it’s hard out here for a pimp… but it’s harder out here for us Cr@ck@z… and ya’ll need to show some R-E-S-P-E-C-T!!! Ya’ll need to R-E-C-O-G-N-I-Z-E!!! And stop being up our @$$3$ over EVERYTHING!!! We wiznill not go quietly into tha nizzay . Put ya mutha fuckin choppers up if ya feel this.. We will not be wiped from tha face of this earth coz of tha color of our skizzay . You’se a flea and I’m the big dogg. We will not be sent ta our beds witout our baller… or fo` tizzle motherfucka witout our dessert whizzich means yo woman!!! Dizzy blame us coz we treat our ladies right n dont pusha KFC as 5-star din’n!!! So FOAD all you h@t3rs!Finally let us say FOAD to those people out there who feel the need to know EVERY LITTLE DETAIL of something I’M DOING. There is a REASON that I AM the one DOING IT. If you need to know about it then I will tell you… otherwise… Fuck Off And Die!!!
If you too are a FOAD Blogger and keeping it real… well link up here…
Labels: FOAD
Ladies and Gentleman… Mrs. T has left the building. It was a very tearful goodbye actually. We sat and talked while she packed her leopard skin bag. I begged her not to go… but Mr. T wasn’t having her spend another week with the Dog here at APODB. It’s almost as if he thinks I was pimping her out or something while wearing a red pimp coat and fedora… makes you wonder right?
So we get to the door, I give her a goodbye lick (on the hand you pervs!) and off she went. She hadn’t even hit the curb yet when the mob started. Apparently word is out that this is the place to be. Maybe it’s the cheap rent… maybe it’s the flat screen tv… maybe its the free licks I give you while your here… probably because everyone knows I’m a pimp and it’s hard out here for us ya know?
I saw an awful lot of familiar faces and this was really the first week where picking someone actually took some time… and of course while I was deciding more people showed up and caused a scene right out of MTV’s Super Sixteen show. Through the crowd though… one face stood out to me… it was someone I’ve read for awhile… someone who is sweeter than cherry pie (and everyone knows how I love me some pie)… someone who was there for the Dog when the Dog was down… that’s right… it was Some Girl.
So I’ve been reading Jul *COUGH* *COUGH* Some Girl for awhile now. At first glance she gives off the impression of just being some other blog, by some other girl, in some other town, and living some other life. There is alot more to it though… and maybe not everyone can see it… so go over there and be sure to look closely. For those of you who don’t get it… well I’ll tell you when her time’s up if you MUST know.
Unfortunately, I had to turn these nice people away… so do the right thing and go see them… and tell them not to worry… the space will be open again in only a week.
So we get to the door, I give her a goodbye lick (on the hand you pervs!) and off she went. She hadn’t even hit the curb yet when the mob started. Apparently word is out that this is the place to be. Maybe it’s the cheap rent… maybe it’s the flat screen tv… maybe its the free licks I give you while your here… probably because everyone knows I’m a pimp and it’s hard out here for us ya know?
I saw an awful lot of familiar faces and this was really the first week where picking someone actually took some time… and of course while I was deciding more people showed up and caused a scene right out of MTV’s Super Sixteen show. Through the crowd though… one face stood out to me… it was someone I’ve read for awhile… someone who is sweeter than cherry pie (and everyone knows how I love me some pie)… someone who was there for the Dog when the Dog was down… that’s right… it was Some Girl.
So I’ve been reading Jul *COUGH* *COUGH* Some Girl for awhile now. At first glance she gives off the impression of just being some other blog, by some other girl, in some other town, and living some other life. There is alot more to it though… and maybe not everyone can see it… so go over there and be sure to look closely. For those of you who don’t get it… well I’ll tell you when her time’s up if you MUST know.
Unfortunately, I had to turn these nice people away… so do the right thing and go see them… and tell them not to worry… the space will be open again in only a week.
- Professional Redhead- Now you have to know that I love and adore anyone with redhair… and Lysie was really the one I was debating about… because I really like her blog and she’s really a great person… so go see her like NOW!
- Kentucky Gurl- another hard denial… go see Kentucky too…
- A Tale Told By An Idiot
- I Ended Up Here… How?
- Knowledge Distribution Center
- My Devilish Side
- Jerico
- Long, Slow, Beautiful Dance
- Live Your Dog’s Life
- The Fifth Column
- Shauner
- My Own Private Water Cooler
- Meltwater. Torrents. Meanderings. Delta.
- Cool Adzine for Marketers
- Winged Emotion
