Look in the box to your right. See her… sitting there… all seductive like… if you look really close… go on… click away… and get that Sharon Stone moment from Basic Instinct.
Ok… so I have a new renter. You guys need to go see Cat. Not only is her blog beautiful, but so is she. Remember how I had my mental day? Well she has some of the same issues… only she is much more educated on it and much more eloquent about the whole thing. When she says, “Hi my name is Cat.” I would say, “Ugggh. Me Cave dog.” But don’t get rude or anything you ruffians… this is one pussy you don’t want to mess with… unlike…
And don’t forget to check out the soon to be live:
Ok… so I have a new renter. You guys need to go see Cat. Not only is her blog beautiful, but so is she. Remember how I had my mental day? Well she has some of the same issues… only she is much more educated on it and much more eloquent about the whole thing. When she says, “Hi my name is Cat.” I would say, “Ugggh. Me Cave dog.” But don’t get rude or anything you ruffians… this is one pussy you don’t want to mess with… unlike…
And don’t forget to check out the soon to be live:
Ok, so there are alot of beautiful blogs out there. Are there that many skilled designers? Well there sure are alot. Digitally Essential did my friend Monique’s blog… and they did a helluva a job. Troll Baby Graphics is another popular design service I’ve seen a few times but most notable on One Lazy Lesbian, and they have CafePress gear (my CafePress stuff is under review… some crap about trademarks or something). Then there are the creators of the Occasional Bitch template I love and drool over so very much West Designs. Then of course there are the Web Divas who have been held responsible for Mommy’s Busy Take A Number. Of course there is also Stephanie over at Mystickal Incense who also does blog design besides making the candles (of which I am eagerly anticipating mine to arrive any day now… ah… soon to be bathed in the aroma of vanilla… but I digress).
Anyone see a common theme in all of this. Right… you are all women!!! Damnit! I am a man! I like to do manly things! I’ve come to the conclusion that women comprise at least 90% of the blogosphere. Want proof? All the fellas in the house gimme a “Hell Yeah!”! What? What? One more time… All the fellas in the house gimme a “Hell Yeah!”! Oh… okay… good looking RockyJay… glad to see you brother… now all the ladies in the house give me a “Hell Yeah!”! What? What? Oh… right… okay… how about all the BITCHES in the house give me a “Hell Yeah!”! Whoa! Yes… that high pitched roar we all just heard that blew out our speakers are the women of the blogosphere. See… I hate to be a told you so… but I told you so.
Okay. So here’s the deal. I’m officially putting out an RFP (request for proposal). Here’s what I want:
- A Blogger platform template utilizing at least the colors black and orange somewhere
- The template must be masculine. Although I am not against having beautiful females in the header, there must be some sort of guyness to it as well. I would like to continue with Mini-Dog as a lead “character” but I understand if that’s not possible
- The template must by designed to change with resolution although 1024X768 will be acceptable
- The template must have three columns. I prefer the double sidebars, but if you have a great idea that puts the main content on either side instead of the middle I am by all means willing to entertain that thought
- The template must be themed to this blog which is entitled “A Pile of Dog Bones”
- One graphic logo must accompany said design that may be used in banners, buttons, and Cafepress items as needed (200 dpi(and NOT get stopped by possible “Trademark” issues) and other CafePress requirements as needed)
- It should be relatively easy for me to add on/take stuff off… so it should be in Notepad and comments in the script would be needed
- You should be able to accept payment via PayPal
- Submissions should include a brief description of how you plan on doing the “theme”, price, and anything else you think would make me go with you
- Proposal submission deadline will be March 10th. Submissions should be e-mailed to me here and a comment should also be left in case it gets caught up in my SPAM filter. Additionally if anyone out there has a Blog Designer you want to “pimp”, well here’s the time to do it… use the comments.
- I will make my decision on who to go with by March 16th and I would like to have a new blog design up by April 1.
So what am I willing to pay for all this. I’ve seen alot of different price ranges especially for a Blogger template. Let’s say the price is negotiable… although I will view any bid over $220.00 to be above budget. In addition, you will of course receive credit on the template that will be there for as long as I use it. I will also advertise your site on a variety of Banner Exchanges with one of my Mini-Dog banners and directing any hits onto it to whichever page you like. Right now I’m thinking of 10,000 views… but I may double that depending on your bid price.
Finally… you will be the proud designer of a manly blog. Now how’s that for history? So… Blog Doctor’s… let the consultations begin… and make me into a Blogging Swan!!!
First things first… BLOGMAD is going to do their Bugout day this Saturday… so if you haven’t gotten in yet on the ground floor of this soon to be (hopefully next week) live traffic gem… then do it NOW!!!
To be honest as I so often am… I am in zero mood to be blogging tonight. Today has been a bad day again… not like the other bad day I recently had… but bad in other ways.
Let’s start with the fact Izzy and I have been fighting since Monday. Because we lead relatively complicated lives, Monday is sort of “our” night. However, this past Monday and Tuesday I was stuck working some marathon sessions. Yesterday we were still being snippy with each other, and things worsened of course today. That’s really all I’m going to say about it… it bothers me too much right now to even write about it.
This morning I received two root canals and a screw into my jaw. Yes… I was back at the dentist. I am getting four posts done from doing some severe damage to my grill, and it is taking awhile partially due to cost but mostly due to the fact I hate the dentist. The smell… the sounds… the pain! Right… you too huh?
So my front upper four are being posted. I had two root canals done two weeks ago… and then this morning he did the other two. The root canals aren’t bad when they get done… seeing as how he gases me and throws something like four amps of novacaine when he does them. The after effects are killer. Ontop of the two left root canals he did, he tossed on a temporary crown with a post on one of the two root canals he had done last time. So… I now have a screw drilled into my jaw that is also causing me extreme discomfort.
Now to add difficulty to everything… I ended up on a board today again since my one dispatcher wrecked her car yesterday. She’ll be okay… so don’t worry… but she’s out the rest of the week. So having to do all this talking and stuff today really was not how I wanted to spend the day. Of course… I sounded like crap and had to repeat EVERYTHING at least twice. Yeah… not a good day at all.
So why am I here? Why am I blogging? Well… I need something to take my mind off Izzy… and surfing isn’t doing it. All these pretty blogs out there… all these beautiful nicely laid out with hot graphics blogs. And then… there is mine. Maybe the light text on black background is getting to me. Or maybe I’m becoming narcissistic like that Humpty person. But then what am I to do?
I could
try designing from scratch… but let’s face it… I’m old… and with all the new scripts going and different things that have caught on I’d be nuts to think I could come up with something as hot as everyone else… especially the graphics. I’m very bad at graphics. Although I do like my Mini-Dog avatar… still… I feel I need better graphics. Maybe a better all around design. I know what I need… I need a friggin’ Blog Doctor to make my blog look better. Maybe that’ll make me feel better. Maybe that will put a smile back on my blogging persona… maybe… just maybe…
Today is a better day. Let me first say that no one was the target of yesterday’s rant… well except for that phony Humpty-Lumpty person. No one should think I was directly referring to them or their own blog schedules about rant days (I mean really Stephanie… so egotistical LOL… but THAT rant cartoon had me ROFLing… Jesus with a gun… that’s what I’m talking about!!!)… it was just something I always found peculiar and threw it in there seeing as how my blood was boiling over other things. Thanks and lotsa love to everyone out there who were concerned by my turn to the dark side.
The truth is there have been alot of factors leading up to it. I suffer from a mixture of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and clinical depression. Now don’t go gasping at the sound of it… my affliction is very mild compared to what others are going through with PTSD or the other illnesses that are out there.
One of the most common misconceptions of PTSD is that it makes the afflicted skittish and phobic with a bunch of nightmares. In my case, it makes me lose sleep and my anger becomes enhanced and all consuming because I have problems regulating the emotion under stress. One of my partners likened it to having Multiple Personality Disorder, because I could be smiles one minute and snap out the next. I think MPD is much worse… because at least I know what I’m doing even if I don’t see how wrong it might be in the moment… but I can relate to people like Cat who suffer from it… because when I’ve calmed down… it’s usually “Oh shit… what did I do now?”
Having PTSD coupled with clinical depression made the doctors actually consider me a complex case and prescribe meds. I was on them for a short time… but I didn’t care for them or the way they made me feel… so now I’m med free against what is “medically sound” advice.
Work lately has been pretty stressful. I’m often left wondering if I want to continue doing what I’m doing as opposed to doing what I want to be doing. Right now I manage a dispatch center with oversight of over 100 units daily. What I’d like to be doing is to be on one of those 100 units. I have my good days and my bad days… and lately its been more bad than good… which builds up to the point where I have a day like yesterday… and I just need to blow.
To be honest… it’s probably alot better to blow here than in person. This way no one goes through a window or a desk… no one hears the screams… and I get paid for one more day which means DJ eats. So once again… it wasn’t aimed at any one person or group… although to be honest I do think IT2M lost some stock value by adding a guy reviewer… but at least they’re remaining honest.
Here’s a site that I found that does online Johari Windows. I’ve done one of these before during a management training seminar… so I’m interested what you my fellow bloggers think of me. So feel free to go on and check it out… and thanks again for all those who expressed concern for me both publicly and privately.
The truth is there have been alot of factors leading up to it. I suffer from a mixture of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and clinical depression. Now don’t go gasping at the sound of it… my affliction is very mild compared to what others are going through with PTSD or the other illnesses that are out there.
One of the most common misconceptions of PTSD is that it makes the afflicted skittish and phobic with a bunch of nightmares. In my case, it makes me lose sleep and my anger becomes enhanced and all consuming because I have problems regulating the emotion under stress. One of my partners likened it to having Multiple Personality Disorder, because I could be smiles one minute and snap out the next. I think MPD is much worse… because at least I know what I’m doing even if I don’t see how wrong it might be in the moment… but I can relate to people like Cat who suffer from it… because when I’ve calmed down… it’s usually “Oh shit… what did I do now?”
Having PTSD coupled with clinical depression made the doctors actually consider me a complex case and prescribe meds. I was on them for a short time… but I didn’t care for them or the way they made me feel… so now I’m med free against what is “medically sound” advice.
Work lately has been pretty stressful. I’m often left wondering if I want to continue doing what I’m doing as opposed to doing what I want to be doing. Right now I manage a dispatch center with oversight of over 100 units daily. What I’d like to be doing is to be on one of those 100 units. I have my good days and my bad days… and lately its been more bad than good… which builds up to the point where I have a day like yesterday… and I just need to blow.
To be honest… it’s probably alot better to blow here than in person. This way no one goes through a window or a desk… no one hears the screams… and I get paid for one more day which means DJ eats. So once again… it wasn’t aimed at any one person or group… although to be honest I do think IT2M lost some stock value by adding a guy reviewer… but at least they’re remaining honest.
Here’s a site that I found that does online Johari Windows. I’ve done one of these before during a management training seminar… so I’m interested what you my fellow bloggers think of me. So feel free to go on and check it out… and thanks again for all those who expressed concern for me both publicly and privately.
Guess which one I’m choosing on this post fucker? Now find out why my bite is worse than my bark.
I can never understand how people can schedule certain things on their blogs. I can understand contest day, self-portrait day, favorite pet day, and all the other days that people can imagine in their wildest and most benevolent days. However, there is one day I could never understand anyone pre-scheduling.
Rant day. How in the bloody hell do you schedule a rant day. Do they divine with tea leaves to decide that every damn Sunday is going to be a rant day? Do they roll a set of decision dice to ascertain from the 1d6 gods of chance what day it should be? Do they set their alarm clock with a metal wire attaching it to their big toe the night before every Wednesday so when the clock goes off they get a shock enough to give them some atrial fibrillation and put them in a pissy mood?
Oh, and what happens when it isn’t “Rant Day”? So do you mean to tell me that if it isn’t rant day then you can’t write about how pissed off you are and instead are required to write about how the kitty looked so damn cute in the outfit you torturously put on him and probably emotionally scarred him for life with? Are you supposed to be all smiles and smootchy bootchies while the world crumbles around you? So its phony ass people like that who I want to take my boot… turn it sideways… and send it right up their asses.
On the topic of phony people… everyone remembers how pissed off I was about poor little Humpty-Lumpty… the girl with the plastic surgery blog who found all these “comments about me on other people’s personal blogs” and was upset about it (mainly because I wasn’t quoted). Well guess what… it’s more than her tits that are plastic… ‘cause she’s a phony fuck just like my old man. See… all those comments… came from one place… yes… that’s right… one blog… in fact to be correct, a comment section of one blog. Can you guess the blog? That’s right… the shit stomping ground of the Bitches ‘O’ Blogs…the Queens of PHP… the Dishes of Disasters… I Talk 2 Much.
Now… while I realize they may not be the nicest people… and I admit they can be quite juvenile… hypocritical… kindergartenish… and downright rude… they can also be enlightening… creative… dramatic… but most importantly HONEST. Yes… at least the bitches are honest. So needless to say… a little war went on between the Bitches and the Humpty. Of course one might revel in this and invest in popcorn expecting a long haul… but it turns out Humpty is worse than the little green plastic army men… and she deleted her blog. This dumb ass let herself get run out of the blogosphere by some sniveling foul mouthed little girls… who by the way suddenly have added some dude Charred to their site as a reviewer.
Now if there was ever a day for IT2M to be burned in place… it was with them adding this guy. Not that I have anything against him… other than he is a FLAMING SMOKEATER!!! Oh… right… he’s mainly a Woodlands guy… who btw are probably the nicest smokeater’s out there… you know… bulldozing the bush and making those foundation saves… right… am I feeling it… oh hell no!!! So now that IT2M has been corrupted with the reviewing presence of cock… yeah their stock value just dropped out… right after exposing Humpty for a fake plastic bitch and replacing her site with a nice mockery of their own… or one of their friends.
Friends… that’s a good one… someone should re-define the word or send idiots to a re-education camp on the subject. Do I sound bitter? No… not really… but you know… work has really sucked the last 24 hours… I mean REALLY sucked. You would think a friend might be able to understand… but no… I get shit for crap that’s out of my control. And as with every new friend… the same argument ALWAYS comes up… I’m a workaholic… I’m pretty sure I admitted that somewhere at the beginning of this blog… it was on my Match.com profile in bold… it is the working Modus Operandi of all First Responders I know… and the people who become their friends always wonder why they “didn’t make the priority list”. Don’t worry… when you stop breathing… we’ll come running… unless its after June 1… ‘cause first hurricane to hit the shores I am SO out of the North Eastern hell and into the promised land of the south.
You know… not for nothing maybe there is something behind this scheduling a rant day. Although my problems are far from being solved I do feel a tad bit better… but then again… if that were true and with my hectic schedule… every mofo day would have to be a scheduled as a rant day.
