Would it surprise you to find out that I like to watch Oprah?

No really, I do.  I have alot of respect for her because she knew what she wanted, and she unabashedly went for it.  Sure it took her 20 something years, but great empires take time right?  Sure she crushed some people along the way, but what media titan doesn’t?  Sure she pretty much always whitewashes the dirty truth which calls into question her journalistic integrity that for years was a selling point, but don’t people like happy endings?  Sure she has been snookered quite a few times by phony authors and professional fakes like Dr. Phil, but haven’t we all gotten our money from that rich relative who died in Zimbabwe?  Sure she has alot of hokey shows and talks about topics she really has no business talking about, but don’t we all do that to some degree?

So yesterday I caught the second half of her show.  It was the Secret Lives of Moms show.  She had a bunch of women, presumably mothers even though there was not one child in sight, talking about motherhood via Skype using plasma screens placed in the audience.

It turns out that Oprah has decided to follow the path of our favorite Corporate Mongers, Wal*Mart, and she has put together her own O Moms Panel.

Placing any sort of blogger on a show with ”Secret” in the title is an outright farce.  Nothing they’ve done has been secret, otherwise I assure you they would have never hit Oprah‘s radar.  Epic fail to the producer who thought up that title.

One of the women actually said that a good way to discipline children is for moms to cry.  She admitted that she pretends to cry as a form of punishment when her children don’t listen to her.  In reality what she’s saying is that raising them to be drama queens early in life is actually acceptable behavior.  The cameraman wasn’t quick enough to cut away from the looks of horror on the faces of the people listening to that crap.  Epic win for the cameraman.

Someone else brought up the “war” between working moms and moms that stay at home.  I fucking love how stay at home mom’s are critical of mom’s who don’t have a husband working for AIG and are out there in the world making sure their children are financially secure.  Of course, those same mothers will tell you how their husbands don’t work for AIG (anymore) and they are just scraping by on the money from their advertising on their little blog… you know after all the mommyblogger conference fees, hotel, airfare, bar bill, and babysitter invoice is paid for.  So what’s the difference between working moms and stay at home moms again?  Oh right, working moms can’t necessarily drink on the job.

Oprah herself was very involved in the conversation… because you know… she’s a total mom… and brought up that mom’s are doing good jobs when they are doing what THEY think is in the best interest of their children.  Isn’t it fucking sad that Oprah has a better idea of what a good mom is than her “elite” O Moms and the entirety of the Mommyblogophere? 

Wait.

If the mommy’s actually listened to Oprah‘s advice, then what on earth would they blog about?

Oh right, how everyone is doing it wrong but themselves.

Business as usual in the Mommyblogosphere.

I Oprah.